Allow the vision to emerge...
Exactly as it does.
Some months ago after rerecording a visioning session for the Dream Sessions: Day 4, I laid down on the floor and hit play to listen. I decided to follow my own recorded voice and see where I went, and what kind of vision I might see. I had a question about my Dream Scenario (an activity in Day 3 and 4 of the Dream Sessions) that I intended to seek clarity around.
I went into the enchanted forest as I told myself to do. I travelled until I met my guide, Gerald, a beautiful sparkling fish who took me into the water. I followed, though I was apprehensive to head down. I know that when heading down in a vision, this usually indicates a seeing under the surface of one's self, into the shadows. I didn't want to go down. But, he'd told me he was there to help me when I asked. So, I followed. Even though I had wanted something light and fluffy, I said OK.
When we seek the Spirit, we can not be choosy about what is offered or we will miss or even repel the gift.
It started as a colorful fishy swim. It was beautiful, light and fluffy like I'd wanted. Until he went deeper down through the water and into mud puddles on the bottom of the sea, Gerald prodding me to come too. I tried to remind him that I was there to consult with him about my "Dream Scenario." But he continued to roll in and out of the mud, happily, inviting me to do the same. In and out of the mud at the bottom of the sea leaving sparkles like crystals on his trail for me to follow.
Finally, he spoke: "Go deeper." That was his verbal message, "Go deeper." I thanked him wholeheartedly for his time and followed the path back to my body laying on the floor in my room with my vision and message.
Gerald swam through water to its depth into the earth. He was sparkly and clean and went into the mud to show me many things that I could not grasp in the moment and attempt to even now.
The symbolism of fish in water is uplifting and prosperous. A fish out of water can not survive, so I am able to understand now the significance of going down. It can still be fantastic in the shadow. We can not survive only ever receiving from shallow orifices, or openings. We can not live stuck in a vacuum and breathe the fresh air of the moment we are in, either. We need to go deeper in to see. We need the ebb and the flow. We need to be still and to move. We need to allow the. moment to emerge how it does.
There is a time for everything.
The spoken message was to "Go deeper," to get into the earth. And it's true. My "Dream Scenario" only scratches the surface of what I really want right now. I will have to go deeper. I will have to say what I want and then roll around in it happily. I can, too, leave sparkles behind me for others to behold along the journey but I will have to go down inside, first, to reveal them.
So we must pack our patience, for we never truly know 'the how' in full color. That bag was not packed when Gerald presented the path to me. I was too ready to believe that I knew, and for a moment was flustered by the unknown being made known. Who am I to deny the possibility that a message can be delivered this way? But there I was, in doubt.
I am grateful for a willing spirit, but I did not have one this day as I watched Gerald and thought about my expectations for this trip. Rolling around in the mud could have been nice, but I missed it. Instead of being impatient, I could have had a visceral experience touching, smelling, tasting, hearing, or seeing-- feeling-- what was possible. But I just watched with a touch of dissatisfaction, unable to do more within the moment.
It's in times like these where we need to give ourselves compassion. We will need to keep giving ourselves compassion. Not at the expense of not growing, but so that we can grow. If I'd have beat myself up because I didn't take the time to be with Gerald quickly and completely, it would have distracted me from all that the vision and message is offering me now. In other words, if I beat myself up about a vision, what good can it have?
There will be other visions.Oh, so many more visions. There will be more for me in the water, or mud, wherever I am to go. When I realize myself and this mannerism in my daily or nightly life, I will do my best to behave in wisdom and yet open to what is now to be revealed. I will keep waking up in and without the dream.
Another day soon, when I am seeking answers, I will lay down on the floor and try again. This time, I will do better, knowing what I know now: no matter what I am asked to do, my presence is required. I could imagine things are not supposed to be this way. Or I can just "Go deeper" still. It's the perfect picture of grace to witness one's self in the flow, brought back into our lives to play. May we receive of the grace.
See what is in the depth by allowing yourself to remember what you know.
Spend time seeking, being surprised and delighted as you look for answers all around you. Go into nature and observe her movements, her silence. Find yourself in places that live and breathe. The answers are everywhere when we seek. There is no escape. Just like we do not escape from who we are even when we forget.
One of the things that really excites me about visioning is how our subconscious mind has time to reveal itself. But this can often be mistaken for foolish play, or illusions. And yes, this can happen. We can get lost in the clouds imagining something happened that didn't if we are not careful. Reality is wavy in the depths. But this does not mean we should not go. No, rather, we should go together.
We can seek the vision together. Let me offer you a couple sparkles.
We all have visions/ dreams for the future. How we address them makes all the difference. It's the feeling that you bring to the little steps along the path to your desire that will open you to the expression or object that you seek. A Vision Quest Coaching Call with me will help us to feel and sort through the vision together. I'll guide you though a short meditation, we'll discuss and take time to feel what emerges, and I'll offer you spiritual coaching to get you taking the next little steps feeling more confident.
I will be your guide, a bridge to remembering who you are and what you are capable of. Take 30 minutes to remember. Start here.
Find the sparkle by propelling your dreams.
Take the vision path in your own time with some guidance from me through each Dream Sessions: daily guide and chat. I suggest 20 minutes a day to dream, so the process is gradual and not pushy, and then go about your day knowing you have done something to propel your dreams forward.
Dream purposefully for 5 days with each days guide and then release, or fire up the dream further in Day 5 with some pressure cooker practices. Each day not only asks you to show up, it also asks you to question what you see and what is available.
You are able to share your dreams and visions with me after your session in each days chat/ temperature poll too. And I've provided timers for each experience within the course's 20 minute sessions, so all you have to do is provide the time.
For years, I have offered another little sparkle that I like to call Word Pictures.
Above is the process that my most recent Word Pic: "Renewal" went through. Each painting starts with inspiration, becomes a word/thought and feeling in which opens the painting to revelation which I pray lights the path ahead of the viewer.
Word Pics. Origin
While living in New Hampshire, going through my yoga teacher training and a rough patch in my life and marriage in 2006, I found that through my grief, through making art of the mud, I could work through trauma and bring more clarity into view.
After my first Word Picture, friends and family would ask me to make them, or I'd offer the ones I made as gifts. So many pictures were being given to me at a time that I ran out of walls. So I bartered with them to uplift spaces and found commissioned projects to decorate homes, a restaurant, and offices, leaving an image of a word that was special to the owner and spirit filled.
This time passed in my life. I moved through some trauma and felt freer. I was done making Word Pictures. I picked up teaching again when I returned to Philadelphia and decided to leave my sparkle for English and Yoga students. I put painting aside not wanting to force it to squeeze in, too.
I am opening to how the sparkle of my visions for your word might support you as we awaken again. I encourage choosing one word for the year or at the beginning of a cycle within your life. This practice helps remind us what we are thinking at the beginning of a journey and becomes a dhristi or focal point to come back to.
We are all going through the process of awakening more and more each day. As you inquire and spirit leads me I will be creating Word Pictures. At the very least, I'll be sharing them here.
"Renewal" Word Pic. (above)
16 X 20
Watercolor and Pastels
For Sale
Manifesting is like that, we must allow it to happen over again. Fall like a waterfall and emerge from the depths like a baby's crowning head. Dreams become in their time on The Most High's cueing. Our job is to follow the sparkles, to go in faith and allow the visions to teach us more about ourselves. The visions that support us in being more loving to ourselves and others more of the time, diving deeply into the mud to leave the shallow world behind for a bit, where we bob delightfully on the surface. These times are important too, no doubt. Still, creation happens in the womb, where it is within and dark.
Let's go deeper into our experience of love, into our deepest visions and see what emerges. Life is calling us to dance with her, and to follow her sparkle just like Gerald was trying to show me in and through the mud.
Rolling in the deep,
Courtney